Almost twenty odd years since then, trying to sleep, I felt a similar dread, a trepidation on how to handle a secret of which I was the lone bearer and I thrashed about in bed with an uneasy mind that refused to settle, waking Su up. I knew Darren would soon find out and contemplated the consequences, the hurt feelings and repercussions of a deed committed during a passage through life as a bachelor ,way before my life took wings, where mine had now become dissimilar on discovering an unknown part of myself .
“Stop kicking your legs about, you’re ruining my sleep”. When stressed, I had a habit of flexing my legs back and forth along the smooth surface of the bed .
Kuwait. My mind went back to the days of war trying to smother my predilection for the present which surfaced despite the fear of being unmasked and made to mortally answer for it.
I had gone back to the office after fidgeting for two days over that decision . I had called Darren once again and he said that the outcome was there to see, one person was already dead and I would be the next one. His basic philosophy was-‘do not take what is not yours,’ much to the contrary of his own ways, where he took everything including his neighbour’s wife and lived a life of debauchery and cunning that should have worn out his soul, pole, hole and sole by then, still he would hold forth on the virtues of prudence and good behavior as a cure for trouble- free and uncomplicated life for others.
It was mid March and the desert temperature had shot up and I could feel the sweat snaking and trickling behind the ears. It was about seven in the evening and very dark, the place looked a ghost town, not many people were to be seen and except for an occasional army vehicle, the roads were empty and the atmosphere had a very sombre feel, you could sense a creep from behind. Reaching the office, I tried the front door, which was locked. I didn’t know what it meant, the Iraqis had used the place as a base and wouldn’t have closed it behind them , so I went over the side where a narrow gap separated our building from the adjacent one, at the end stood an iron gate which led to the block at the rear.I clambered over the gate and walked along the back wall towards the middle where a small courtyard met our back wall. Nobody was around so I tried to clamber up but with no proper foot hold I slipped, bruising myself and after another attempt when I had one leg over, I was caught.
